The Empty Space In My Life

“There are meaningful words and there are pointless words, and then there are words that hurt.” – Mary Horowitz

Like a crossword puzzle its sometimes hard to figure myself out but i’ve learnt in life what matters most is to believe in God’s love for me and to love myself in spite of what anyone says about me.

Because I am who God says I am.

“I’m not a hero. I’m a humble guy who is lucky to be alive.”

And thats worth being thankful for even though I’m spending another thanksgiving and christmas away from my own family.

 

New York times crossword editor, Will Short says, “We have a natural compulsion to fill empty spaces.”

And if the empty spaces inside of us come from making our way into a world that doesn’t always embrace unique then God can fill our empty spaces because he loves us just the way we are.

 

Which is why I pray to him to fill the empty space in my life, and that is to be a part of a loving family everyday.

 

I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God so that you may know that you have eternal life. This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. (1 John 5:13-14)

 

“In the journey of life just find someone as normal as you, if not a whole bunch.”

 

If you give a blessing you will receive a blessing

YAZOO CITY, Miss., Sept. 4 (UPI) — A Mississippi high school football player is being credited for saving a school bus of elementary and high school students from a passenger wielding a gun.

Surveillance footage showed Kevin Eulls, 18, tackling the 14-year-old girl and wrestling the gun from her as other students fled the bus as it traveled to school Tuesday, CNN reported Friday.

“Things could’ve got real ugly and there would’ve been a lot of grieving families in Yazoo County right now,” Sheriff Thomas Vaughan said. “I’m just extremely glad this young man took the bull by horns and stopped a potentially deadly situation.”

Eulls said he acted because he “couldn’t let anything happen” to his fellow school bus passengers.

The unidentified girl withdrew a semi-automatic handgun from a bag, then paced along the aisle, threatening and shouting at children she said teased her, Vaughn said. The bus driver unsuccessfully tried to calm her before Eulls acted, the sheriff said.

The girl was arrested and taken into custody as a juvenile, Vaughn said. She faces 22 counts of attempted aggravated assault, 22 counts of kidnapping and one count of possession of a firearm on school property because the bus is leased by the school district.

Eulls’ mother, Ora Eulls, said she was a little shocked by the incident.

“I told him I was proud of him — we all was proud of him — and I told him don’t ever scare me like that again,” she said.

 

courage under fire

I Don’t Have It All Together

I wish i didn’t care about you sometimes

i wish i didn’t love you sometimes

i wish i only lived for myself again

i wish you were out of my life like everyone else i’ve cared about

i cry out my heart every night just so you can hear me

but everytime i wake up my life feels empty just like before

empty of your peace

empty of your joy

empty of your love

its like when i draw closer to you

i keep losing more and more

i keep losing more of me

my brokenness leaves me weak

and all i know to do is retreat into a shell

i become just like them

and act like everything is okay

because they seem to have it together

they know where their next meal is coming from

they know who they will spend their holidays with

when all i can do is hope that i do find these things

its not as bad as it is for some

all the same i don’t want to be just another actor

i don’t need an oscar i just need security

but you keep telling me i can only find it at your altar

and yet you know how many times i’ve been down this road

you know how many times i have asked

for a deeper love

and not just for material things

i don’t want material things to draw me further away from you

but if i don’t have material things

how can i live in a material world

without a place to call ‘home’

Lord if only i could find someone who is just as wounded

someone who is just as passionate to share your love

then maybe i’ll be okay

maybe i’ll be able to come back

but until then help me find that place, that secret place

where I can be like you and you can be like me.

 

“The church will never change until those in it desire to really live a life poured out.”

Spiritual Food (Sunday snippet)

What good is it, my brothers (and sisters), if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him?

imagine your friend or family member suddenly falling terribly ill and they are seriously in need of a doctor, what would your reaction be like?

would you go on as if nothing had happened or would you frantically begin to look for help in order for their lives to be saved?

You have been called to be a life saver whether you know it or not but if we continue to be indifferent or nonchalant about it  then we are choosing to ‘push the button’ by our silence and non-commitment to the cause.

I’m God’s salesman and I am here to make you an offer

if you choose to share your gifts and everything else that you have indiscriminately (without discriminating), i guarantee you God will save another soul.

Just Live out your faith everyday by your deeds and people who are different from you will begin to follow this Jesus that you claim to believe in.

 

Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. (Mathew 28:19-20)

“We may not Dance the same way, but we can learn to Love each other just the same”

Are you in this because it is profitable to worship God?

They say it is easy to worship God when everything is going well, but when God does things that you think a Good God should not do or when you begin to see the pain in your life and in the life of other people

then the question becomes, is God still of value to me?

In  our trials his worth is always at stake.

When all is going well believers have little sense of their need for God but when calamity strikes they will tell a different story.

When you are struggling to find a job or when you lose your health or a loved one, something screams out inside, why?

So, What do you do when you have doubts?

Well, if we are to follow the example of Job then we are to fall to the ground and worship God and let God be God.

There are things going on in the spirit world which if you and I were preview to it would really impact the way we live here, because the way we live here is really important but we don’t see that so we think to ourselves ‘no big deal.’

‘Life just happens’!!!, without explanation, senselessly – from our standpoint

We don’t know why some people die young or why someone has cancer

But we have to go on trusting and believing because

Events on earth must always be interpreted in light of Events in Heaven.

God sent to us his Holy Spirit so We can worship him even when we do not understand. Even when we can not see the end.

Job wasn’t able to see the last chapter of his book when he was going through his great sorrow, but eventually he was there and he experienced it because he began to see the hand of God even in his suffering and disappointments.

Are you seeing the Hand of God working in your life?

The other day I was really meditating on this and I realized the things I complain about to God, don’t really make sense.

I mean I was asking him if its fair that i struggle to meet people with the same passion and desires as I do here in L.A

and he reminded me – the passions and desires i have are meant for me and not for anyone else and i should just appreciate the one or two friends that i have because their passions and desires are meant to be unique to them too.

“We may not dance the same way, but we can learn to love each other just the same.” – ePhanY

God doesn’t need to give us an explanation in order for us to worship him, His promises are enough.

He promises to always be there for us even when the circumstances of life turn against us, and that is all we REALLY need.

If God be for us, who can be against us. (Romans 8:31)